Perception

"There are stereotypes out there about birth order, and very often those stereotypes are spot-on," says Delroy Paulhus, a professor of psychology at University of British Columbia in Vancouver. "I think this is one of those cases in which people just figured out on their own."

Perception. As we grow up we become more aware of the the influences around us, what our siblings or friends have experienced in their lives and perhaps our own experiences have shaped us. I have the privilege of starting off our topic by talking about being the eldest child, with a younger brother to be exact. 

I suppose you could say by experiences as the eldest have been like others that the oldest have experienced. I was definitely given more responsibility than my brother - if more responsibility means being trusted to be left alone to make sure I get my own homework done, I make my own bed, and put together my own lunch at school. Now, neither of us were never given a huge amount of responsibility - we never had to cook, there was little cleaning besides our own room, and our largest chore was switching off doing the dishes at night. But they were never over bearing, and I think I developed my independence, my feeling that I want to have my own space where I can live alone and take charge of my own life. 

I think it is easier to see the difference in growing up by looking at the way I perceive my brother was raised. I say perceived because there is definitely a bias there, where I feel like I had to do more than my brother did. They went easier on him than me - he depended on them more to make lunch, cook on weekends, and make his bed. I felt like I always jumped up before him to help with what I was asked and they always threatened him with punishment but never followed through. They weren't very good with punishment with me either, but he was always the one less motivated than I was. Or, as I said before, who I perceived was less motivated. 

He did have to deal with more academic pressure. I did very well academically through my K - 12 years, so my parents expected him to do the same, that meant straight A's for his high school years. I think, the most importance influence on being the oldest child was the independence I feel. I want to spend my summer learning more about cooking, cars, and woodworking, all which I think would be very good skills when I get out on my own. 

I do not really have much more to say on the topic. I do not think much about my childhood experiences and how they affected me. I feel like I am just the way I am because I am and that other things besides birth order had a greater impact on who I am today. I wonder if it affected my brother more, who always had to compete with the older sister who seemed to do pretty well in the areas her parents wanted her too. I am interested to read the younger siblings perspective, but maybe that is because I have not experienced that role. Brandon is speaking on the topic tomorrow, in the same older sibling role as I was, and I wonder what he will have to say about that.